Holy H2O

Husband and I have been through a lot lately, and our finances are struggling to stay caught up with the chaos. Above all of this, we are grasping desperately to a strong desire to recognize how much God has given us and to remember that we are called to give back, not from what is left over, but straight off of the top. The way that we have chosen to do this is to give 5% of our take home pay to our parish and 5% to other charities. Those charities vary each pay period, and after he gets up from the nap he is taking, I'm going to talk to him about this being our next charity. There is just no reason, with all that is good and wonderful and advanced in our world that a child could die from not having access to clean water. Talk about the simplest of necessities. So, wherever you stand on tithing, whatever your financial resources, please consider following the link below and considering a gift to children who have the simplest of needs... thank you.

http://water4christmas.com/

oh yes i am...

3 guess who won 2 free tickets to the upcoming Billy Joel & Elton John concert.....

Seen & Not Heard?

My venting on this topic might go on for a bit, so if it is annoying you, please feel free to get on my case about it or ignore it... either way really does not bother me....

I'm thinking about that whole idea that children should be 'seen and not heard'... I'm thinking about it in a historical context that my experience can date back to my grandparents' generation. I'm certain my parents were raised with that mentality (lest grandpa make them go out and 'pick a switch'... no lie). In turn, my parents' generation raised their children in more of a 'live and let live' kind of world. I think my generation was the beginning of the 'raised with privilege' and 'everyone gets a trophy' and 'who cares about appropriateness, let the child EXPRESS him/her self' kind of world... in other words... spoiled.

I was one of the 'poor kids' growing up. At least, in my world I was a poor kid. I went to private school for 7 years and had to buy most of my clothes at Target and shoes from Payless. Occasionally we even shopped second hand! I didn't have a seperate playroom in my house, and I was 13 before I had my own tv (a black & white handmedown from my grandparents!!!!). We only went out to dinner once a week. I took tap lessons for one year and since my black tap shoes that my dad found at a garage sale were not the right color for our recital, my dad spray painted them white. Yup... we were POOR (she says in TOTAL jest).

Ya know what... growing up 'poor' brought a lot of perspective, as has my background in ministry. As Americans (oh how I could go on forever) we don't know the first thing about poor. I don't think I know a single person who has ever dug through trash for food. In fact, I don't know anyone who goes without 3 meals a day (even if those meals were bought with foodstamps, WIC, or other charitable means).

The gift of my children is such a tremendous blessing, and raising my children in a balance between 'seen and not heard' and 'spoiled' seems like the right way to go. I don't spank my children, but I also don't let them get away with murder. My girls have an entire bedroom full of (new)toys and closets that are filled mostly with handmedown clothes.

I heard a story once about an American bishop going to Africa and celebrating mass outdoors. He was struck with awe over how quiet and well-behaved the children were a strong contrast to the noisiness of his urban cathedral back in the states. Speaking to his brother bishop about it after mass he wondered at how families in Africa were able to raise their chidlren with so much respect and discipline while attending a long, hot Sunday mass. The African bishop replied that the children were so quiet because they had no energy because they were hungry.

Do those who attend mass and look down their noses at noisy kiddos not understand this concept? Have they never been a parent and don't know what a struggle it is just to find that delicate balance between squelching their curiousity and teaching them reverence? Or have they forgotten? Or was it beaten into them and they accept that as normal?

I make no claims at being perfect in any way, least of all in my parenting skills, but I AM trying. I don't judge, but I see a lot of others who don't try at all. Do my efforts count for anything? Is it fair to preach about how sinful it is, and a bad example to one's children, to skip Sunday mass, but then at the same time make those parents feel completely unwelcome in the parish... rather it isn't the parents who are unwelcome, just their kids.

mildly disheartened

Just have to put this vent out to the world... need to let it sit out there and be my 'silent voice' as it were...

Fake people drive me crazy. As an introvert, I do a lot of sitting back and observing... and when you keep your eyes and ears open and mouth shut, there are plenty of opportunities to pick up on two-facedness, shmoozing, charlatan-like behavior. There is a person in my life who seems to personify this lately. A person whose role is supposed to be 180* in the opposite direction. I'm not sure what insecurities lie beneath to make someone choose the fake over the real, I go back and forth wondering if it even matters. To be a learned person, to be a public figure, to represent yourself as a holy person but at the same time to live a life of greed, arrogance, and belittling... is there really any excuse that makes up for that? Some more patient, more understanding than me may try to say this person is "only human", but the blatant inconsistencies between how a person "presents" him/herself to the greater community and how a person individually criticizes and makes others feel unwelcome is not acceptable.

Maybe this is generally the response of a mother wanting to protect her family, guard her cubs if it were. I'm not sure. What I do know is that I am proud of my beautiful family and grateful for God's blessing on us. There isn't much I can do about this person, other than pray I guess. Why doesn't that feel like enough?

4

Today, my oldest turns 4. This one feels especially significant for me, and the only reason I can think to explain it is that my 4th birthday is the first one I really remember. There's a sense within me as a parent that if I know I have memories, clear specific memories, going back to that age, then my kiddo can too. And that reflects on the intentionality in my parenting. Not that I'm not already intentional, just that... I hope I'm not screwing up too much.

But enough about me...

a few pictures of my beautiful girl...

2 turns at joy

in the past few weeks, despite the chaos, i can look back and remember specifically 2 things that are so joyous in my world...

the first is a major milestone, one that has been a LONG TIME COMING...

oldest daughter has struggled so hard with the potty training issue. when it comes right down to it, the girl is stubborn and the only answer to the potty training issue is that she would be 'trained' when she was darn good and ready. there wasn't ANY getting around that. i worried that we may be backsliding when 3 days in a row her teacher sent home clothes needing laundered from accidents. after those 3 days, i sat with her as she got dressed in the morning, showed her the 'pretty panties' that mommy had just purchased (some may call this wasteful, i call it grasping for sanity, but i am so over trying to scrub out stains from underwear. in our house they typically get thrown out) and how mommy really wanted her to try to not have an accident, to go poop and pee in the potty, and keep her panties pretty. now, i am nowhere near arrogant enough to think that it was those words that made a difference. i was pleading with her more than anything, and as i tried to hide the desperation in my voice, i know that above anything else, SHE made a choice that day. and boy did i get to hear about it. her wonderful teacher used her cell phone to let her call and tell me "Momma! I pooped on the potty- at SCHOOL!!!!!" I rejoiced with her, congratulated her, told her daddy would take her for a special treat, and encouraged her to keep up the hard work. I thanked her teacher for helping us on this journey and for sharing our joy and making that moment special for all of us. This all took place last week on Wednesday and we have been 100% accident free since then. In fact, she isn't even wetting her pull-up at night. This morning I asked if she thought she wanted to try to wear panties at night but she said no. I definitely will not push on that. I'm just SO PROUD of her.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My other joyous story can actually be told in pictures. I don't want to sound snobby or arrogant, but I believe that I have 2 really beautiful daughters (and I'm growing a 3rd... watch out world!)... their similar looks really strike me at times, and this time was no different. I happened to catch a shot of younger daughter smelling some mums at a local garden center and the picture I caught looked (un)surprisingly similar to another one I had caught 2 years before (of her sister)... what do you think?

younger daughter almost 2, October 2009

oldest daughter almost 2, October 2007

Cruise Control...

I'm sure its obvious if anyone is even still checking my poor little blog here, but I'v ebeen on serious cruise control. Keeping the car between the lines was about all I could manage for the last 2 months... here is a short rundown...

~husband started school and another season of cross country (which means waking up at 5 am)
~oldest daughter started school only 3 days after a diagnosis with a double ear infection
~youngest daughter developed an ear infection shortly after that
~youngest daughter and husband were diagnosed with a strange virus that resulted in sheer exhaustion, fever and sores in their mouth that made it difficult to eat or swallow

~youngest daughter came down with bronchitis followed up by a nice round of thrush from her antibiotics

~oldest daughter got a stomach virus

~husband and I caught her stomach virus

~oldest daughter came down with bronchitis

~oldest daughter got another stomach virus

~I was diagnosed by my ob/gyn with a medium (fist-sized)fibroid growing off of the back of my uterus (on the outside) toward my spine which can cause some pretty uncomfortable back pain
~meanwhile youngest daughter has had 5 weeks straight of unexplainable diareah

Yeah. Needless to say my life has been hectic, messy, frustrating, expensive, and tiring. Oh and did I mention that in the middle of all of that our dryer and our heater stopped working? Fortunately for us, the fixes for those only totaled $40 (which is good b/c our savings is about drained)...

We racked up well over $200 worth of co-pays to the doctor not to mention I-don't-know-how-much extra we've spent on: prescriptions, otc meds, sprite, carpet cleaner (for the diareah and vomit), paper towels, disinfecting wipes, ramen, applesauce, gatorade, etc. I think once we add all of that up the toal comes to around $500. Yikes. That is kind of a lot when you think about it. I could have a new couch for $500 easily. I need a new couch, but I won't be getting one anytime soon.

But, for now, I am grateful. Yes, you heard me... GRATEFUL. Today, my family (for the most part) is healthy, my bills are paid, I have a job and a roof over my head. Oldest daughter is THRIVING at her school, youngest daughter's language skills are skyrocketing, husband finishes cross country season this weekend, and this weekend we celebrate oldest daughter's 4th birthday with not one, but two fabulous birthday parties (one for family and older friends, one for the girls in her class). We also happily celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary, found out that this little peanut is going to be a girl (Lord help us! ha ha), and managed to go on 2 date nights within one week. Not too shabby. We are blessed.

So, Thank You Lord, for this:

And this:

And this:


And this:

And this:

Amen.